Exactly one week ago, I was on the annual canoe trip that the man and his friends arrange. Though it was only my second time, I felt like I was understanding the technique more and was able to be more efficient with each stroke. It was so much fun! It was so refreshing to be out in nature and not have to worry about anything but the upcoming rocks and rapids. (We also had a magical unicorn accompany us on the entire trip.)
Immediately after the canoe trip, I headed back to work. I had no idea what to expect. I was welcolmed back with open arms and numerous hugs. It was very touching to have so many people care and express how happy they were that I was back. I tried my best to keep up yet still ease myself in slowly, but it was a challenge. Though I was never rushed, I knew there were urgent matters and I had to act upon each request. Luckily, I managed to quickly get back into the swing of things. But each day drained me a little bit more; by the time Friday rolled around, I was visibly done for the week.
After experiencing the normal interactions, I realized that I am much more understanding and accepting of my own circumstance. Not every day is as easy, but I am slowly accepting the reality of my situation and nurturing the respect to listen to my body and say “no” when necessary. The past month has really helped me prioritize what–and who–is most important in my life. Circumstances and thoughts will always change but I’ve found it incredibly important to take that time to figure it out. Even if I don’t know everything (or anything!), I’ve always found comfort in telling myself: “I am not meant to figure everything out. But I am kind, I am grateful and I am in love with life.”
Lastly, I’ve learned that loving others that are difficult to love is a huge challenge. But I had read somewhere that you “like people because…and you love them despite…”. With some time for reflection, does this ring true for you?